to roll or not to roll...

[865rolla]

I'm so confused about rolling anymore... ever since i had those moles removed & got stitches, my minds been on skiboarding. the main reason i roll anymore is just to be with friends and cuz they want me to chill with em. it's beginning to feel repetitive.

every weekend: skate, go back home at night with friends and watch skate videos, talk about skating, go skate the next day.

grind, grind grind grind grind... they all feel the same anymore whether im doin full cab back farf, fast step 360 makio, or true top porn. switching up isnt that great. all of it feels almost boring to me now. a sign that its effortless... which is good if i want to get better, but i want to do something that requires some effort, or i get bored of it. not saying im as good as it gets, because i'm nowhere near... just saying i've gotten real bored of grinding. feels like the same-o-same-o, reguardless of how i spin or switchup to it. cess slides got a little dull awhile ago too. doesnt matter what size rail or ledge its on either.

i never thought the day would come where i just don't care either way about rolling. i still like the feeling of gaps, spins, and wallrides though. i may take a break from grinding so much till i feel like doing it again. i think i'll jus go bust some gaps and stuff. that's what i did a long time ago when i got tired of grinding. if im on skates, its impossible to completely give it up, just so i dont forget stuff. maybe it'll come back, or maybe not, hmm...

overall, im just kinda sick of all of it. doesnt make me as happy as skiboarding does, but that may be cuz theres more wind, slicker surface, bigger jumps with softer falls and landings, and maybe because its new to me and im still learning tricks without holding myself back.

or maybe im just sick of the industry and the people that roll... either way, it's not the same... i'm not doin it for the love anymore, doin it for the *im bored.. really bored... i need to skate* instead of "i wanna go skate!!!" lol.

if anybody got any suggestions, hit me up.

[Roussel]

if your tired of skaring with other ppl, or other skaters jsut go out one night, alone, find a place where no one will bother u, get sum portable music and jsut skate around just to experience skating in its purest form, dont think about what tricks in the text book, or trick u see other ppl pulling, jsut pull whatever comes nartural to u, dont even worry about naming any tricks you do. and even try to bring skibaording style to your rolling if your pumped on skiboarding.

[865rolla]

i bring rolling style to skiboarding is what's funny. i have a hip hop roller style when i skiboard.

my mind instinctively names tricks when i think about them. it's a natural thing, trick names dont bother me. it's the obsession over tricks that do.

might try that alone thing... i used to do that with a cd player for the first year skating... only problem is that i'm known to do things out of random instinct, which is good for fun & progression, but is bad for safety when you're alone lol. for example, back when i began skating, i could jump an 8 stair, so i decided to try to jump off an 8 foot wall b/c i figured it wasnt much higher... went straight down on my face lol. i was like *shit that was big*. i'm smarter than that now, but that part of me exists still.

im pumped on skiboarding b/c it feels more free & natural because i dont have people around me talkin about it 24/7. part of it may be that im in nature sort of. nature effects me like that, and its all suburbs around most the skatespots here.

i think ive figured out what to do though. im not gonna quit rolling. i'm just gonna change my attitude and my state of mind. i dont care what the rest of em are doin. jus gonna do what i want where i want and when i want. gaps, wallrides, cesses, ledges, rails, or jus rollin if i want to. just go out and have some fun.

i think part of the problem is video cameras too. i always bring a camcorder with me to film.

not sure what im gonna do to ignore them talking about tricks. i can tell some of them to just shutup cuz they don't mind. some will get upset.

thanks rou.